Chronicle 55: Number Two

Ahhh, number two. Could be that you planned it. Could be that the little devil snuck up on you until one day... PLOP! Just couldn't hold it in any more. Little, big... doesn't matter. This puppy will change your life forever.

Oh, shit! You thought I was talking about *whispers* number TWO? I meant the second CHILD! Geez, get your mind out of the gutter, people!

I never formally announced that we had another baby, but considering my readers are mostly friends and family, I thought, you know, that you already knew...

But for those people who just happened across my corner of cyber space (probably Googling baby fashion or sore nipples), I HAD A ANOTHER BABY!! YEAH! The snark is strong with me today, son.

How number two has thrown us for a poop. I mean, a loop.

1. Our oldest child has become a servant, parent in training, very special helper!  This is a conversation my, um, friend had with her son recently while she was trying to nurse a wiggling 10 month old with FANGS adorable brand new teeth (who had just decided to blow out of the ruffly $50 outfit from Grandma):

"Hey honey, can you run upstairs and get Mommy a diaper? Yeah, upstairs. IN THE DRAWER! IN THE BIG WHITE DRAWER! No, in your sister's room. YOUR SISTER'S!" When he brought down his favorite pair of underpants instead, I...um SHE just smiled while crying inside.

2. Where in the sweet potato is... ?!?!?! Everything is suddenly missing. Stuff that you wouldn't dream was possible to lose. The baby's entire collection of 20 bottles, your son's favorite toy screw driver, the fake spiral topiary that used to be on the mantle, step stools, potty chairs, and entire couch cushions. Where in the KALE CHIPS do these things GO!??!?!? Either that, or they turn up covered in sticky unremovable substances. Martha Stewart, are you for sale?

3. LAUNDRY. We are at the point where we all wear one outfit a day. SO WHY IS IT that we are doing two loads of laundry EVERY NIGHT? GRRRRFLALAKJDBkhgsvcjaghfd I can't even.

4. My ride. I drove a crossover with one child and now, due to a lack of room situation, we upgraded to a full on SUV. I love it, but the closer I get to owning a mini-van, the closer I feel to losing my sanity. This birth control better not fail, because I will not be purchasing a big ol' van any time soon EVER!!!

5. Sorry, not sorry, but I am never 100% squeaky clean. Because KIDS.
"Just took a shower, Ma? Here, let me barf on your leg."

"Oh, Dad, so glad to hear you got this shirt back from the dry cleaner's. Let me wipe a snail trail of snot on the shoulder."

"Just spent 45 minutes on your hair and makeup, Mommy? I've got some super sticky yogurt that will add a nice pop of color. Let me make sure it gets on every single layer so you have to wash it again."

I can't fail to mention all the dried cheerios, puffs, goldfish and other cracker type crap that manages to glue itself to my BUTT!

And  that, my friends, is just a sample of how number two has flushed my former life away. Yeah, yeah enough with the lame jokes. But seriously, I've gotta go.

xoxo,
Hot Mama

Chronicle 19: Spring (Fashion) has Sprung!

Even though my little part of the world seems to have skipped straight from winter to summer, I need some sort of transition. Trading chunky sweaters, jeans, and boots for shorts, little sundresses, and light cardigans just seems a little hasty...premature, even! I am ready, however, to dive right into the pool of this year's spring trends. Think cool, fresh mint, feminine floral prints, precocious polka dots, and pastels galore. Excuse the alliteration. I can't seem to help myself. (Side note: becoming a mom means that my nerd levels have literally skyrocketed. Best part? I don't care! Win, win.) Behold... a lovely graphic to demonstrate some of the prettiest examples of what you'll see out and about this season:

http://pinterest.com/pin/100557004149932519/

Please note that, although I have seen a lot of the 90s on the runway lately, the floral seen below is not channeling Beverly Hills, 90210 or My So Called Life. The prints are small to midsize, and mostly paired with a lighter color. Olivia Palermo has a way of making anything look chic, but she looks gorgeous in this floral dress by Zara with peachy lips and cheeks. Love it! 

I found this adorable alternative at Target, a flowy navy blue floral designed by Jason Wu. It's a perfect Winter-to-Spring transition, and I love the pop of gold. Navy is considered a neutral, so you can go crazy with colorful accessories! 

Also, I am currently obsessed with mint. It's such a fun pop of color. And it's so unassuming that you could either go big with mint jeans or a skirt, or subtle with jewelry or a cardigan. It's like purple; it looks beautiful paired with any skin color/tone. Paired with my fair skin and red hair, there is just something about it. I found this pretty cardigan at J. Crew Factory last weekend, which I paired with a  floral cotton shift for an afternoon classical concert.

Pink is another super flattering color, although it can be a bit tricky to find "your pink". I tend to use this rule: the lighter your skin color, the lighter the pink. Tan and darker skinned ladies can rock the bright pinks, and lighter skinned mamas should try and stick to softer, peachier pinks. I'm in love with this sheer pink blouse matched with the tangerine shorts. It's just so light and airy, with a touch of romance.

http://pinterest.com/pin/100557004149952402/

I have also been on the hunt for the perfect pleated maxi skirt. Pleats are super tricky. They need to be the right width (on the small side), and the fabric has to be light, rather than heavy. Otherwise you'd end up emphasizing areas that most of us try to avoid drawing attention to. This perfectly pink maxi skirt is by Halston Heritage, but it is, of course, out of my price range (this happens ALOT).

Here is a more affordable option for you hot mamas out there... be sure to bring out the shaving cream and razor before you show off your fabulous legs in this cute mini version! This can be paired with a tank, t-shirt, or even a slim wrap top, which would give it a ballerina vibe. Love!

Another trend that I've always been reluctant to participate in is polka dots. They just conjure images of Minnie Mouse for me. BUT... it seems that they are smaller and (maybe I've changed) cuter this Spring. I love the dress (from Topshop) seen below, and the way it is accessorized makes a world of difference. The hat combined with the layered bangles and watch take the polka dots from childish and whimsical to sophisticated and fresh. Reminds me a bit of Princess Kate!

This minty, polka dotted sundress is perfect for Spring when paired with a cardigan. In the summer, we can go without! This is the perfect hot mama on the go look when paired with a jacket or cardi, and flats or sandals. All you need to sass it up for date night is a killer pair of heels or wedges. Mint can be paired with a number of colors, and looks stunning with simple gold jewelry. Don't get too serious with your hair, either! Beach waves are the perfect compliment to this seafoam hue. 

So, that's my trend report for today! Did you see anything you love, or would be willing to try? What colors, prints, shoes, etc. are you obsessed with at the moment?

See you soon, my cherry blossoms!

Xoxo,

The Hot Mama

Check out the images above (and more) on my Pinterest board "Outer Beauty"! http://pinterest.com/OneHawtMama/