Chronicle 38: Say What?! Wednesday: Traveling with Baby

A friend of mine is flying across the pond with her adorable 8 month old in a few weeks. For those of you who are interested, that is a 10 hour plane ride with a recently mobile little guy. An independent, mobile little guy. She wondered if I had any suggestions for traveling with a little one and, after wracking my poor, tired mommy brain, I gave her a few suggestions that helped me when my husband and I flew cross country with G.

Baby G, at 3.5 months, and mama!

Planning the Flight:

1. First thing's first, it is MUCH cheaper to hold your child on your lap, no matter the length of the trip. Many airlines DO have discounted seats for children under 2, but you will still pay close to full price. If your child is not mobile, you are allowed to carry them in a Baby Bjorn or something similar.

If you choose to buy a seat, then you must have a TSA approved car seat for your kiddo. Usually the car seat will say if it is approved on the side, or you can check the manual it came with, or even call the manufacturer. If your child is mobile, they may not want to sit in the car seat the entire time, so be prepared to end up holding them anyway!

Traveling with a car seat

2. Try to schedule an early/late flight. Most children do better in the morning or late at night, and will actually sleep after take off. The cabin pressure and motion of the plane combined with snuggling equals nap time! We left early and came back late, and G slept for most of both flights!

3. In that same vein, do your best to leave on a day when the airport is not as busy. This will make it easier to navigate the airport and security. If you are switching flights, pick a layover that is over an hour, preferably two. This way you can gather everything, de-board, pick up the stroller & car seat, etc. without rushing, panicking and running through an unfamiliar airport.

4. It is painful for little ears when the plane takes off and lands, which causes VERY unhappy babies. The best way to combat this is feeding your baby during this time. If you are nursing, make sure you pack a blanket or nursing cover to take on the plane. You are allowed a certain amount of pre-made formula, so check with your airport's TSA policies to see how much you can carry-on, and how much you can pack if your destination does not have the formula you normally buy.

5. You can check the car seat with its base AND your stroller for FREE at the gate. They will have it waiting for you when you disembark.

Where to check your stroller

6. Airlines will ask you to bring your baby's birth certificate to verify age and identity. They do not accept copies. Even if you have obtained your child a passport, take the birth certificate as backup.

Packing for the Plane/Trip:

1. If you are visiting with relatives, ask if they have access to a Pack n Play or portable crib. Many hotels also offer these for free or an additional fee, so call and check with your hotel. If you are unable to procure one at your destination, see if you can fit your Pack n Play into a golf bag and take it with you. 

2. Pack enough diapers & formula to get you to your destination, then buy the rest when you arrive. This will increase your packing space dramatically. 

3. You will need at least 2-3 outfits per day for baby. If you have access to a washer & dryer, pack less and make life easier for yourself! Also, take bibs that can be wiped down and don't have to be washed. You don't want to have to worry about rotting food particles stinking up your suitcase!

Easy Wipe Bibs

4. An inflatable tub is cheap and easy to fold up and bring along. If your destination is warm, it can double as a baby pool! I found mine at Buy Buy Baby, but you can also buy them from Amazon, Target, Babies R Us, etc.

5. Bring a backpack rather than a diaper bag. That way you can pack your entertainment/snacks along with the baby's and it is easier to carry.

Vacation:

1. Stick to your normal routine as much as possible! Nap times and mealtimes should not be delayed and /or missed. It will be difficult because you will want to do so much, but it will be to your benefit to avoid meltdowns when traveling AND deviation from your child's routine once you return home. Little ones cannot handle it as well as we. 

2. Traveling on airplanes can cause constipation in babies, so be prepared. Give a bit of water and juice throughout the trip to help them regulate (always talk with your pediatrician first).

Juice!

3. Take a small first aid kit with you. I always pack baby Tylenol & baby Ibuprofen along with our Dr.'s dosage recommendations. I also pack nail clippers, a rectal thermometer, cotton balls, and Neosporin. You never know when you'll need them! 

4. Don't panic if you forgot to pack something! Many times you can find what you need at the airport, a gas station, or Target/Wal-mart/Meijer once you arrive. 

Most importantly: have fun! Traveling with a baby can be stressful, but roll with the punches and everyone will enjoy themselves. Please comment or e-mail with any additional questions, mamas!

Xoxo,

The Hot Mama

Chronicle 54: Holidazed & Confused

I love loved the holidays. Getting together with friends and family, taking part in longstanding traditions (awkward small talk until you remembered that you grew up with this person and have many hilarious memories together). I used to bask in sweater weather, eat too much turkey and gravy, and spend hours sprawled on the floor looking at old family photos.

When I got pregnant with my son, I was so excited to share moments like these with him. I couldn't wait to teach him the perfect dressing to green bean ratio, or watch him joyously discover the fun of running around with cousins while the grownups watched with knowing smiles. This was all before reality sunk in.

It's no secret that having small children is difficult. But there is a HUGE difference between "knowing" and KNOWING. Perhaps you don't have children yet, or it has been awhile since you've had little ones in the house. You may feel a certain sympathy for the mom juggling a plate of cranberry sauce and a newborn. Or the Dad chasing after the son who is going after Grandma's breakables. It might even be a bit funny to watch prized knick knacks wobbling toward the edge of the table. Later? It will be funny to me, too. Now... well, here's what you DON'T know.

Mom had a sleepless night before Thanksgiving because the baby was in a strange place and would not sleep in her portable crib. The little bundle of sweetness has graciously started teething and no longer requires that swaddle you found on some obscure website. Also, the months it took to convince said baby that Mom was not a pacifier have been shot to hell overnight. Add in some tryptophan and Mom's ready to plummet face first into her plate.

The son slept soundly in his inflatable bed on the floor of the guest room,  but you would never know it, because he is running around in circles and bouncing off walls like a pinball to burn off energy. Usually he gets to play outside, but it's cold and everyone is inside. The only thing that will keep him still and occupied for a minute is watching YouTube videos on Dad's phone. Cue the judgement.

The food is delicious and heavenly, but after the second baby the weight just won't come off. Please don't tell Mom she looks great as she balances a plate of food on her wobbly stomach. Thanksgiving dinner looks like too many nights at the gym that she will never have time for. Appreciate the thought, though.

The parents have not had a spare moment alone since the oldest was born. Holidays included. All the teenagers and college kids acting all moony and the older couples who don't even make eye contact any more make them feel alone and depressed. Divide and conquer, and hope that someday they will be reunited. WE. ARE. SPARTAAA!

What you realllly won't see is the aftermath. Children thrive on schedules, so even if the travel is for "just a few days", this throws children off and sends them careening on a downward spiral... with consequences lasting for days. Days = months in parenthood. It's science.

The son will refuse to nap. So will the baby. There will be LOTS of crying and tantrums. It will bleed into school the following Monday. Then an explanation to teachers will be expected. "It was a rough weekend. That must be why my son beaned you over the head with his Lego tower." Awkward.

The bags will lay unpacked in the parent's room for days. Laundry will pile up and baby girl will have to wear big brother's old onesies. OLD. She will scream and cry at the indignity. Mom and Dad will finally get a breather after coaxing the children into bed by threatening them with "Santa won't come if...!". The parents will then promptly fall asleep to Netflix. At 8:00 p.m.

What I want to constantly scream is "We're battling sheer exhaustion! Nothing will fix that, not even sleep!" To you a day or so of travel may seem like nothing. To us it's like Mount Everest.

The truth? I love you. I love you ALL. But when it comes to dealing with small children, please try to understand. I love my sanity and my schedule more. For now. 

"It's just one year."

Happy Holidays,
The Hot Mama

Chronicle 21: Truths & Discoveries

Do you ever have a sudden moment of clarity? As in, you've heard the same cliches over and over again, but it just doesn't ring true until it is relevant in your own life? Parenting is JUST like that. I feel as if I have a revelation every single day. Sometimes it is just an affirmation of a revelation I had the day before. Anyhow, I have compiled an even numbered list of these new truths and discoveries. Six, in fact. See? Even number. That's my OCD shining through. So lovely.

Six Truths & Discoveries of Parenthood:

1. Fear vs. Faith
My last post contended with a pretty heavy realization: I can either live each day in complete, paralyzing fear that something may happen to any of my loved ones, or I can have faith that every thing will work out the way it's supposed to. It sounds simple enough, but when I look at my son and try to grasp how much I love him, I pretty much fall to paranoid pieces. I've realized that it is time to let go of what I cannot control. Spending every waking moment worried that I'm going to get a horrible phone call will not stop it. I would rather spend that time enjoying my family and working on my happiness, instead! To read a more in-depth analysis, check out Chronicle 20: Fear vs. Faith.

2. You will cry...ALOT
I was a fairly sensitive person before I had my son. I might have cried at the end of E.T., or listening to my brother play a beautiful piece on his violin. Now I am an emotional mess. I have now cried at the following: a Geico commercial, a particularly moving episode of Sabrina the Teenage Witch, the thought of grocery shopping, finding an actual bra that fits (not a sports bra), Word with Friends, and every single stage of my son's development. I teared up just now writing about crying. I try to avoid certain movies, TV shows, and books because I know they will trigger a cry fest. I see every thing from a mother's perspective, and perhaps the hormones are still raging. It's just become a fact of life.

3. Everything has changed. Especially you.
Your friends are still going out and you're staying in with a teething baby. You may lose some of these friends. You WILL gain others. You would rather sleep next to your spouse than with them. You stop doing your own laundry and concentrate on the baby's. Your parents and in-laws call and visit much more often. MUCH more. People come to visit the baby, not you. You find yourself excited that the baby finally pooped, that your nipples are not as sore, that you can finally wear something other than pajamas and sweatpants. You settle for a good ponytail, rather than those "messy" beach waves. You are different. You are stronger. You are experiencing love that will never fade.

4. Being a parent is like being in a club.
No, not as in The Viper Room. Like, the "You understand the bags under my eyes and the throw up on my t-shirt" club. You talk to random mamas at the park, in the grocery store. You have a new appreciation for the frazzled-looking mom shuffling her kids into a McDonald's because she's too tired to cook. You congratulate a new mom for merely getting out of the house (did that today at Victoria's Secret. Although I wonder what she was doing THERE. I'm just now wanting to step foot in that place...SEVEN months later.) You nod in agreement when another mama describes exactly how you've been feeling or going through with your babe. You can talk about bottle brands for hours and whether you like Babies R Us or Buy Buy Baby better (I prefer the latter). Stuff that may seem mundane to anyone else is fodder for mamas. Welcome to the club!

5. The little things become more important than the big things (for now).
Say whaaat? Let me put it this way. Big thing: lunch and shopping with friends. Little thing: Baby's nap. What wins? NAP ALL THE WAY, FOLKS. Because a cranky baby is a cranky mom is a cranky dad. We are even cutting Easter short this year because all of the activities fall around Baby G's nap time. The good news is that this is a sacrifice that will only last a few years. At this point, I need these naps as much as he does!

6. Your child IS amazing. 

I am the mama who is obsessed with her baby. Every single thing he does seems like a tiny miracle. He moves a toy from here to there? INCREDIBLE. He blinks? BRAVO! I used to be annoyed by parents that bragged about their child's seemingly mundane accomplishments, but now I GET IT. However, I'm not about to slap an Honor Student bumper sticker on my SUV. I'm content capturing these moments on video and film to share with people who show interest. Or, I will watch them myself!

What discoveries have you made since becoming a parent? What are some cliches that are now tried and true in your life? Looking forward to hearing from you!

Xoxo,

The Hot Mama